19. So this priest tried to add me on Linked-In

So this priest tried to add me on Linked-In. He was 60-odd years, balding with grey temples and sporting a benign laugh not unlike the one the new pope shows off. He worked in a rural community, a long way from the suburb where I reside. So it was puzzling why he thought I might be interested in him as a ‘professional connection’.

Perhaps he stumbled upon one of my profile pictures on Google and – spurred on by the colour of my skin – was convinced I could be another joyful African in his growing army of black catholic souls.

Perhaps he had acquired a sexual appetite for Nubian boys during his time in the Congo?

Perhaps he was just in the habit of adding just about everyone to his Linked-In profile because he was gunning for a Guinness World Record: most connections on a social network site by a priest?

Perhaps if I hadn’t been so curious as to answer his request, I would now not be tied in a damp cellar, on all fours, naked and soaked in gasoline, surrounded by fat men in big pointy white hoods with huge flaming torches, led by the most unlikely KKK-member you could think of.

 

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5 thoughts on “19. So this priest tried to add me on Linked-In

  1. howanxious says:

    I like that priest… 😀

  2. neontaffy says:

    First humorous… then a very sudden, serious, horrifying turn at the end 😦 Well done.

  3. I was waiting to hear the rest of the story. I never thought it would go that way and while I cringed I wanted to know what else happened.

    • I’d love to read a flash fiction that tells what would have happened after my last line. If you, or anyone else, feels up to it, feel free to post in the comment section.

  4. Mark Miller says:

    His final thought as Father O’Donahue struck the match:
    “Catfished again… I knew I should have called Max and Nev.”

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