“You don’t like Sophie’s fiancée, do you, hon?”
He didn’t so he nodded. Helen put her wristwatch on the bedside table.
“But he seems such a nice boy. He is polite. He has manners. He even kept calling you sir when you told him Pat would be equally fine.”
“That is precisely why I don’t like him,” said Pat. “Don’t you find him… too perfect?”
“Is there such a thing?”
Damn right there is. Pat dunked the false teeth in the water. His tongue licked his upper gums.
“I think you’re just being grumpy. Your little girl is growing up and you can’t stand it.”
“She’s 29, Helen, for God’s sake. I should be relieved she’s finally getting wed!”
“So what’s your problem then?” Helen let the comforting warmth of the blanket embrace her.
“I can’t quite put my finger on it. But something is off. Did you watch him eating his asparagus?”
“He’d never had it before.”
“Exactly! Who has never eaten asparagus in this day and age?”
“Now you’re being silly, hon.”
Pat kissed his wife goodnight and put out the bedside light. He didn’t say a thing for a full minute. But he just couldn’t keep his opinion to himself till the next morning.
“You know, there are times you’d swear he was from another dimension.”
He was. And marrying the most eligible girls in America was just the first phase in his race’s plans to enslave Earth.
Did you enjoy this story? Then why not try the 101 stories in 300 words or less in YOU’RE GETTING SLEEPY, THE HYPNOTIST’S APPRENTICE YAWNED.